Y

You know, I've been doing a lot of fantasizing, and I want the love of my life to smell like lemons. I don't know why, I just want to be able to get close to him and immediately get sublte scent of lemon. I guess that what happens when you grow up in a house full of lemons. You see, I grew up with my grandparents, and they had a lemon tree in the back yard that, i wouldn't say was big, but you could tell it had been there for years, and my grandfather ate nothing unless it had lemon on it, even fruit, well, not all fruit, just melon. But regular food, yeah. He would pick lemons all season, and juice them, and freeze all the juice in used 2 liter soda bottles. That way he'd never run out of lemon juice. but he never did, because there would be so many lemons, they'd just sit there in the freezer as half of the lemon juice went straight to his "lemon bottle". A used water bottle with a sport top that he'd always keep filled and in the fridge. Not just that, but my grandma, every once in a blue moon, would make this massive batch of bread with a slight lemon flavoring, that, when she made it, everyone would go crazy for, especially my cousin, whenever he visits (the hick lives in georgia, he wants to be a truck-driver, i often dread telling people, that I, the very essence of california freedom and shallowness is related to him) begs my grandma to make it. So now, older, yet still young, i've added another impossible trait to my dream-man. -sigh-, I want to fall in love already, everyone i know just takes love so for granted. Like, one of my best friends, my scratch friend (scratch friend cause were best friends but were constantly insulting, criticizing, and fighting with eachother, but still, best friends) has this boyfriend who has openly said that he LOVES her, and i know, me and my friends are young but, then shes telling me hes just a fling and intends on just throwing him away when school ends, which, i find awful. as much as he and i are not really good friends, or not even realy friends at all. But, im the kind of person who doesnt like watching a person get hurt like that. that time i threw a ball at him and hit him in the family jewels, that, was hilarious, but,hurt on an emotional level? i dont think i can take watching that, as much as he wouldnt care what happend to me. -sigh again-, I wish life werent so complicated. life just sucks, dude. okay, 1 wow, i almost never say dude, and 2, who xactly am i talking to? God I'm so alone. friends are great. theyre wonderful, im lucky to have them, but alredy, i want someone to LOVE. I better go, i was supposed to type two reports for school tonight that were due on friday, and i never did, and now I have to find some excuses. Bye, Bye. Sleep tight.